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Still A Child

Our children would receive a kite for Easter and they were very eager to fly them on the first windy day. I enjoyed watching as they struggled to get their kites aloft, untangled them from each other and various limbs, and then grinned from ear to ear as they finally watched them soar. However, I knew it was only a matter of time before the inevitable happened. One of them would come stomping in, crying, and throwing their kite in a pile on the ground. They would complain that it was junk and ruined and that they would never fly a kite again! I would glance over and could see that the string was tangled, but not beyond saving. They would stomp around for a white before sitting down to work out the tangle, all the while muttering under their breath. I would casually walk by and say, "If you want any help, just let me know." No response. After several more minutes of watching him struggle, I again would offer to help if they would just ask. Again, no response. Finally, after a few more times, they would ask for help. I could usually fix the kite in a minute (it would have been quicker, but alt of their efforts had made it worse). Soon they were out the door with their kite, despite previous threats about the end of their kite flying career.

As I look back, I think about how I am so often like them. Something doesn't work out or go my way and I stomp around, yelling things (I wish this were figurative, but it's quite literal). All the while, God is just standing around, watching, saying, "Hey, I'm right here, if you want my help, you just have to ask." But I would rather wallow and feel sorry for myself or try to fix it on my own. How silly and childish I am. I end up making the situation worse before I turn to God. 0, that I would turn to him first!

When I began teaching my children, I assumed that I would shower my great knowledge upon them, but the more I watched and taught my children, what is revealed is MY sin and MY need for a savior. I am no better than a 1 year old, who cries when she doesn't get her way. My heart can be as dark as a 3 year old, who loves the word 'NO.' I can be as vain as a 5 year old, who spends hours looking in the mirror. I can be as careless as a 7 year old, who never completes a task. I can be as unsure as a 9 year old, who needs constant reminders of her worth and value. I have been a Christian for over 32 years. As I look back over that journey, I am amazed by how far I have come, and by how much I still need HIM, day by day, hour by hour, second by second. I am still a child in desperate need of a Savior.

For His Cause,
Tim Woodward