ONLINE CHURCH BULLETIN
It’s So Cold That
*Politicians in Washington, D.C. had their hands in their own pockets.
*I took my gloves off and there were only three fingers left.
*Al Gore was asked to return his Nobel Prize.
*Hitchhikers were holding up pictures of thumbs.
*Chickens were rushing into Kentucky Fried Chicken and bedding to use the pressure cooker.
*When I dialed 911, a recorded message said to phone back in the spring.
*The optometrist was giving away free ice scrapers with every new pair of eyeglasses.
*I chipped a tooth on my soup.
*Grandpa's teeth were chattering — in the glass.
*When we milked the cows, we got ice cream.
*UN weapons inspectors suddenly decided that chemical weapons might be hidden in Hawaii.
*The snowman knocked on our door and asked to sleep on the couch.
*We had to kick a hole in the air just to get outside.
*My moustache shattered when I laughed.
*We had to salt the hallway.
*We ate lunch at Chilango's just for the heartburn.
*When we put a frozen pizza in the oven for 25 minutes, we got — frozen pizza.
*Nobody needs to buy hair spray. Just spray on a little water, stick your head outside, and that hair ain't goin' nowhere.
*The boiling point of water went up to 266°F.
*I thought I had a stone rattling around in my boot — it turned out to be one of my toes.
Why can we talk about how cold (or hot, or rainy, or dry, etc.) so readily to others but are so reluctant to tell them about Jesus? This past week it seems that everyone (including strangers) wanted to talk about how cold it's been. Can you just imagine a town, or even a church, where people would begin a conversation with God? In Deut. 6:7 the people were to talk about God when they sat in their houses, when they walked by the way, when they lay down, and when the rise up each day. Jesus told us in Matt. 28:19 to: "Go therefore and make disciples of all nations..." Now, how can we do that unless we talk about Him? It's so cold that I am grateful God has provided warmth for me!!
For His Cause,